I was talking with a fellow Senior Leadership Team member who thought I should be pleased with my impact on our organization. He wondered why, despite the success, I seemed disappointed and maybe even a little angry.

I shared this quote by Martha Graham:

“There is a vitality, a life force, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and there is only one of you in all time. This expression is unique, and if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium; and be lost. The world will not have it.

“It is not your business to determine how good it is, not how it compares with other expression. It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open. You have to keep open and aware directly to the urges that motivate you. Keep the channel open.

“No artist is pleased. There is no satisfaction whatever at any time. There is only a queer, divine dissatisfaction, a blessed unrest that keeps us marching and makes us more alive than the others.”

He seemed to get it, especially in that last paragraph!

Life is short, and there’s so much to do. I wasn’t disappointed by what we’d accomplished. I had already moved on to what we needed to do next.

I love praise but don’t have time to bathe in it. Instead, I need to know who I am and what I care about and figure out what’s next.

Martha Graham was a dancer and choreographer. I’m not that at all, but her quote touched a nerve. I’ve been creative through writing, photography, music, and people at work.

I’ve almost always focused on making something new and better happen. I’ve been habitually and unconsciously dissatisfied with what is and want to make it new, different, and better.

Maybe I like jazz because it’s like that too. Nothing is ever the same as it was. Every performance is unique. Searching. That’s the whole point!

It’s not my business to determine whether my contribution is good or bad, ugly or beautiful. I have to get my ideas out there.

And do that again. And again. And again…

Until … the end!

Thanks for reading! What questions or comments do you have?

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Today is Martin Luther King's birthday, and I share the story of how he influenced my role as a change agent throughout my career:

1. Early years as a student: I spent my elementary and early high school years soaking up knowledge. I was a good kid and excelled at school. Too young to push for change.

2. Disappointed with the slow pace of civil rights progress: I was disappointed in my church, feeling we weren't doing enough. For example, I don't recall us sending buses to the 1963 "March on Washington." I opposed Malcolm X and Muhammad Ali because they weren't Christian, but MLK wasn't militant enough for me. Yeah, I knew nothing!

3. The day everything changed for me: On April 4, 1968, my family was gathered to celebrate my brother's tenth birthday. We never had the party. Instead, we sat transfixed by the images on our television. Martin Luther King was assassinated that night in Memphis, TN. I was a junior in high school and started seeing differently.

4. Starting to lead: I suggested having an assembly program in high school focused on black history and culture. The proposal was accepted, and our faculty advisor gave me a stack of jazz records, telling me we needed a soundtrack. That was my introduction to jazz. When I stood to read a portion of speeches by MLK and Malcolm X, almost all the white students walked out, inevitably leading to fights outside of school that day. That wasn't our intent, of course, but I was accused of making trouble, what Congressman John Lewis later referred to as "good trouble."

5. My First Reorg: A couple of years later, I proposed changing the structure of the Afro American Society at college to make it more inclusive, including renaming it the Black Student Union. My fellow students accepted the idea, and we reorganized. A lot of positive changes after that.

In one of my first jobs, my boss asked me to read through a stack of letters to the Governor and "see what jumps out at you." I picked 3 ideas from the pile, and the Governor signed them into law 6 months later. My work on that project set a pattern I repeated many times during my career, using communication and influence to build support and get things done without having control.

I spent my career visualizing positive change and working to make it happen. It's been rewarding and started with my response to MLK's assassination.

I’ve often advocated for significant strategic changes where I’ve worked.

Trying to influence others we don’t control always involves the same kind of process:

• See an opportunity or challenge

• Identify a good solution, usually based on frameworks that have produced dramatic results in other organizations

• Discuss the problem and solution with colleagues who support change

• Share with the boss and the leadership team

• Seek a decision to forward

The results of these efforts vary widely. From my experience, sometimes the magic works, and sometimes it doesn’t.

It’s rare that everyone jumps on board. And sometimes people seem supportive (how can they not? It’s a great idea!), only to resist.

Leadership team members often wait to see whether — and how strongly — the boss supports the change.

They may say yes at the conference table and walk out saying to themselves, “I’m not doing that!” They might advocate for the status quo or their preferred opportunity or solution.

I believe change is essential, and I am committed to making it happen. I’ll do whatever I feel necessary, and the problem lies therein.

It’s okay to be a little naïve because not knowing you can’t do something might be the only way you can actually do it.

On the other hand, you have to be realistic. It’s okay to try and see how it goes. Maybe once or twice.

As the change agent, you must consider the following:

• Whether this is likely to work

• What are the risks?

• Is it worth the effort for

  • the organization?

  • me?

  • my job?

  • my career?

• If not here, where else can I make a difference?

The answers are consequential, and we sometimes put off asking the questions or taking the steps that those answers require of us. I know I’ve done that.

Yes, there’s no progress without hope, but you must also see clearly. In other words,

Don’t Hope Yourself to Death! Capisce?

Leave a comment below if you have questions or want to know more about this story.

There’s a lot more to tell.

This is a follow-up to my post: 25 Ways Most Leadership Is Bad.

Suppose your team is thriving and in good shape, maybe doing better than before the pandemic. The rest of your organization has serious problems, the biggest being that the leaders don’t see any problems.

I recently talked to someone who faces this situation, and I realized that this was me in the last few years before I left my last company. In fact, I’ve often been in this situation for much of my career.

I remember a meeting with one of our teams, and someone said we were a “bubble.” Everyone else nodded in agreement. Being in a bubble felt good because we did great work and had strong relationships. However, they also felt vulnerable (and we were)!

Bubbles exist within organizations

• They’re high-performing teams

• Produce excellent, even breakthrough, results

• Have a strong positive culture

• Employees are listened to and supported

Bubbles are, by definition, fragile. They can be crushed by the organization. Others don’t like what the bubble represents, so they try to kill it.

Bubbles can also burst from the inside due to conflict. Plus, teams are always changing as people come and go, putting the bubble at risk.

Leading a bubble is hard on the team leader. You can hear the whispers, sometimes yelled loudly. You feel pressure to conform, pressure to revert to the mean. ”Why is Team X different?” ”Why do they get to do that when we can’t?”

It’s stressful!

My advice: Don’t Give in to the Pressure:

1. Protect the Bubble — Try to keep it intact. Nurture it. Support it. Continue and build on the practices that helped build the bubble in the first place.

2. Stay Out of the Fray — You may feel like keeping your head down and staying out of the fray. That’s actually a good idea and may be essential to survival for you and the bubble. Do good, innovative work, and consciously decide when it’s a good time to share your results more broadly.

3. Connections — Identify and connect with other bubble leaders. Share ideas, resources, mutual aid –- connection. While staying out of the fray, you can help others with common interests and mindsets, and they can help you.

4. Coaching — Consider retaining a coach who’s been through this before and who can help you think about the options. I’ve found it helpful to have a sounding board, someone I can talk through ideas with and who can help me identify and navigate around my blind spots.

5. Leave — You’re a change agent who has to create change. So far, I’ve offered advice on doing the minimum to support your team, protect the bubble, and move forward. If that’s just not enough, you may want to change your work location to one more aligned with your capabilities and desire for impact.

In short, focus on your team. Make them better, stronger, and safer. When you run into roadblocks, find another way to keep innovating. Produce great results. You’ll be modeling the change you wish to see in your organization.

At the same time, be conscious of your environment and “Don’t hope yourself to death.”

Leave a comment below if you have questions or want to know more about these ideas.

There’s a lot more to tell.

I’ve spent most of my career as an internal change agent (or intrapreneur). I’ve been fortunate to rise to the executive level, where I had or felt the freedom to act without getting permission. But there was always resistance.

What Is Leadership?

Here are my favorite definitions:

Joel Barker: “A leader is someone you choose to follow to a place you would not go by yourself.”

Doug Conant: “Leadership is the art and science of influencing others.”

Here are 25 reasons most leadership is bad!:

#1: I have the Wrong Motivation

I want to be a leader because:

• I receive financial rewards

• I have power

• I exercise control

I’m self-focused and evaluate everything based on “what’s in it for me” or “how will this hurt me?”

#2: I have no Leadership Philosophy

• No aspirational philosophy or strategy

• I’m managing behaviors and getting through

• Lack of trust

• Feel and spread fear — everyone cowers

• I talk philosophy, but I don’t walk the talk

• Philosophy changes based on my circumstances

#3: I Don’t Know How to Lead

• Simplistic philosophy

• I’m just Riding the Beast until I can have a Safe Exit (or RBSE)

#4: I Don’t Walk My Talk

• Say one thing, do another

• I model the opposite of what I say I want others to do

#5: I Think I Can Talk My Way Through Anything

• Implicitly thinks everyone else is stupid

• They’re not stupid!!!

• However, I’m often able to talk my way through RBSE

#6: Mutual Dependency with my Boss

• We both profess not to know about the problems or say/believe “everything is fine” because that helps each of us RBSE

• “If you don’t point out my inadequacies, I won’t point out yours

• Sometimes my boss is a Board or a Commission that is not in a position to know the problems, and because I carefully manage them to protect my job and RBSE

#7: Leadership is Hard

• I have to listen AND act

• That takes time and effort, and I’m already too busy

• Leadership puts RBSE at risk

#8: I Don’t Have Time for That

According to Tom Peters:
You = Your calendar*
*The calendar NEVER lies.

#9: I’m Habitually and Intentionally Uninformed

• I mistrust any results or information that don’t fit my desired narrative (and protect my RBSE)

• “Who said that? That’s not what my people would say!”

#10: My Leadership Team is Dysfunctional

• Lack of trust, avoid conflict, lack of commitment, no accountability, inattention to results

• More emphasis on calling it a “Leadership Team” (status over results)

• No or inconsistent team-building

• Psychologically unsafe for us (and the people who report to us)

• I’m unwilling to build the team

• I avoid going first and being vulnerable to build trust

#11: I’m a Bad Supervisor

• I don’t coach or mentor my subordinates

• Poor people management framework

• I’m more focused on technical performance than the well-being of people who get the work done

• I don’t put in the time required

• Consequently, I’m a poor role model for my managers, who are also bad supervisors

#12: Bad Manager of Managers

• Flawed role model for other managers

  • I “don’t want to micromanage” (i.e., manage) unless it threatens my RBSE, in which case I’ll reach down into the organization, bypassing my direct reports and undermining trust, conflict over ideas, commitment, accountability, and results

• I favor faux harmony over results

#13: I’m Not Accountable

• I blame others

• “It’s Not my fault”

• Invulnerable

• Don’t hold myself accountable

• I hold others accountable when I perceive threats to my RBSE

• Poor role model

• I always use accountability when talking about someone else, not myself

#14: I Don’t Take Action

• Sometimes I don’t know that action is needed

• I also don’t act when I do know (unless my RBSE is under siege)

• Poor role model

• When I don’t take action, people give up

• “Bill’s office is where good ideas go to die!”

• The listening tour helps you know the problems and what you should do. Once you know, you must take action!

#15: I Always Have An Answer

• I have to solve every problem

• I have an answer in my head before I even hear your take on the problem and possible solutions

• I listen to respond

• My questions aren’t (really) questions, but designed to get what I want (again, I’m not listening)

• In other words, I use questions to manipulate others, so I get what I want (and especially RBSE)

#16: I have Blind Spots and Favorites

• Everyone can see my bias and bad decisions (except others whose RBSE might be at risk)

• Really!

#17: Control Freak

• I want to make all the decisions

• I have to make all the decisions

• I have to approve everything

• I gum up the works with bureaucracy

• “We’re traveling at the speed of ME!”

• Our strategic principle: “Think small, go slow”

#18: I Avoid Responsibility

• They say people leave managers, not organizations

• I say, “So and so left because they got a great offer from XYZ Corp.”

• I also attribute my beliefs and opinions to others (“I’ve heard others say that you [blah. blah. blah.] <-- This thing YOU believe)

• I practice gaslighting

#19: I’m Greedy

• I’m motivated by more $$$ for [me, shareholders, etc.]

• I assume others are motivated by money

#20: Corruption

• It happens, and bad leadership may overlook or otherwise tolerate it (until and unless my RBSE is threatened, which is also often too late)

#21: I’m waiting for the Boss to Lead

• “My boss isn’t doing [ABC Good Thing], so why should I?”

#22: Submit to External Politics

• “I’m powerless here”

• “I have to!”

#23: Lack of Communications

• I assume communications is top-down (we have to do more telling)

• I don’t share my thinking

• I don’t reinforce messages (repeat seven times in seven ways, so the message sinks in)

• I don’t L.I.S.T.E.N.! (see above)

• I’m a poor role model because I don’t walk my talk (see #4 above)

#24: “Our Culture is Strong”

• I ignore signs our culture is problematic for several reasons cited above (lack of time, don’t want to do talk that I have to walk, gotta protect my RBSE, etc.)

• I prefer to tinker with the culture rather than take steps to transform it and make it better for everyone)

• Psychological Safety: Is it safe for people to speak up without fear of negative consequences?

• Who’s responsible for that?

#25: Protect What I Have

• I’ve arrived and want to continue reaping my financial and other rewards

• I have to protect my RBSE!

• RBSE represents my fear

This list is my first draft, and I’m sure I’ve left things out and gotten some wrong. In this type of organization, people, especially front-line supervisors, are burned out and frustrated with the top leadership team and senior management.

I presented reasons why I think most leadership is bad. Poor leadership is fixable when leaders are willing to do what’s necessary, beginning with themselves and their motivations for being a leader.

I can hear it now:

“Don’t be naïve, Bill. This is the game!”

I agree this is the game for mediocre organizations. Intrapreneurs and change agents prefer — feel compelled — to pursue excellence!

What have I gotten wrong? What have I left out?

Leave a comment below 👇🏾👇🏾👇🏾 and let me know what you think.

As self-proclaimed Chief High-Five Officer, I cherish National High-Five Day (the third Thursday of April). I haven’t celebrated in three years because of the pandemic, and I retired from my role on April 1. No more high-fives!

How did high-fives become so important to me?

It was the result of an accident.

In 2014, I launched an employee survey based on Gallup’s Q12 questions as published in First, Break All the Rules. The questions are answered based on a 5-point Likert Scale. A “1” means you strongly disagree with the statement, and a “5” means you strongly agree.

The book suggests great companies maximize 5s. For example, the first question is, “I know what is expected of me at work.” In a great company, most employees should be able to strongly agree (or “5”) with that statement.

I was in a meeting with our Supervisor Advisory Team recommending a training plan to help supervisors understand how to interpret the survey questions and their results.

The SAT liked the plan but changed almost every element. They thought the program’s name should include “High-Fives” since we wanted to maximize 5s. “Good, let’s go,” I said, and the meeting began to wind down.

As Diane started to leave (she had suggested the name), I stood and gave her a High-Five. Later that day, she sent all of us this email:

“As Bill and I ‘High-Fived’ at the end of our meeting today, it occurred to me that you can’t really effectively High Five by yourself. It takes more than one person. It is a shared validation of a positive outcome or success (which can be any step achieved along the way), agreement of ideas, vision, or action plans. And, it feels good, brings inspiration, acknowledges, carries momentum and gives positive reinforcement. Have you ever experienced a negative High Five?”

I became a high-fiving fool!

Over the years at work, I would periodically go on a walkabout, maybe returning a phone call or email with a quick visit to a colleague on another floor or building. Sometimes I was wandering around, getting some steps in. I thought of it as “Managing By Walking/Wandering/Wondering Around.

While walking, I’d give and receive high-fives from people I passed. It was fun, energizing even. At some point, I self-proclaimed myself the CHFO.

Here’s part of a Kudoboard post I received when I retired from my CFO role (a little different!) earlier this year:

Bill, before I got to formally meet you, you came around our office one Friday when there was hardly anybody in; and gave everyone who was there working away at 3:30 in the afternoon a big High Five. I figured because I was new, I might get bypassed, but you came over with a huge smile and gave me a High Five on a day when I was really tired and ready for 5 pm. That small gesture was HUGE! I asked around, and everyone told me you periodically did that — even though we’re not in your department — and I was very impressed. … Thank you for being you — and hope to see you around!

I was high-fiving because it made me feel good. I didn’t realize until reading this message that this simple, uncomplicated act that I was doing for me could so profoundly impact others.

Never misunderestimate how small gestures can impact others.

Leave a comment below if you have questions or want to know more.

There’s a lot more to tell.

I have blind spots that people who know me best can help me navigate.

My coach suggested this personal branding exercise. Here are the steps:

• Ask 5 to 10 people who know you well in a work setting to each share five words they think describe you best.

• Choose people you trust and who can be honest with you.

• Capture the words they offer in a text document.

• Edit the words so minor variations in how they describe “creative,” for example, all use” creative.”

• Optional: Use a word cloud generator to create a word cloud to help you see the emphasized words.

These words reveal your current brand, so take some time to reflect:

• How accurate are they?

• Why do you think that?

• What behaviors contribute to the words they used?

• Why do you think that’s so?

• What changes should you make?

• Which words should be your focus?

This exercise is a great starting point.

• You can use it with your direct reports and colleagues.

• You can identify behaviors you might need to change.

• You can learn how you might position yourself or your company in the marketplace.

I hope this is helpful. If you have questions, drop a comment below.

All my jobs resulted from my network, primarily from referrals

• My first job came courtesy of a senior year internship. My contact referred me.

• I received a call asking if I’d consider working in the Governor’s office. I’d been recommended.

• My Governor’s Office boss hired me for my next job at the New York Power Authority.

• I was promoted to VP-Corporate Finance while at NYPA.

• I was recruited by investment banks and left NYPA to join Lehman Brothers.

• A former investment banking client referred me for the CFO role at SFPUC.

• The headhunter called me a third time about the Tacoma Power CFO role. He told me, ” You should be interested. There’s more to the job than what’s on paper.”

I don’t get the job. Instead, the job comes to me.

My Advice

• Be the person others recommend – ” You should talk to Bill! He’s good. He can help!”

• Always do the job well and more than what’s required – be an intrapreneur!

• Be helpful to others – build a great team and improve the organization’s culture

• Use your network – The best jobs come from people who know people who know you well.

• Take on challenges – the most rewarding jobs have been the most challenging.

• Say “YES!” – try to say yes when asked to help. For example, I was asked if I’d consider serving on the United Way Board, and I said yes. Great opportunity to learn and to help the community.

The jobs that came to me led to a wonderfully rewarding career.

Please follow my posts, share your experiences, and ask questions if this resonates with you.

Thanks for reading!

While I’d been job hunting, I didn’t know Walt, and his call was a surprise. He described the role, and I told him I was definitely interested.

I interviewed and was hired, starting the new job three weeks later on the first business day in January.

After a few days in my new job, Walt gave me a ten-inch high stack of documents and said, “Why don’t you read through this and see if anything jumps out at you?”

The pile contained letters, reports, and whitepapers that had been sent to the Governor proposing one idea or another.

Three ideas jumped out at me

They involved international business transactions outside the reach of state and federal tax laws and banking and insurance regulations. Making the proposed changes wouldn’t reduce revenue and might permit jobs to move onshore and into New York.

I shared my analysis with Walt, and he said something like “see what you can do.”

Six months later, the Governor signed all three bills into law

After considerable work with my colleagues and agency officials, three bills were introduced in the State Assembly and Senate. We negotiated amendments, and the bills passed the Senate during the last night of the legislative session.

Governor Carey signed the legislation and singled me out for praise. It was exhilarating!

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I Learned Some Valuable Lessons

This experience of operating without a net and working with people I didn’t control set the pattern for my career as a corporate maverick and intrapreneur. Here are a few lessons that might help you.

1. Lucky and Smart: Somehow, in a brand-new job, with no equivalent experience, I picked three good ideas from a pile and achieved unbelievable success. I wasn’t a banking, insurance, or tax expert, but had a kind of intuition that has always been there.

2. Supportive Environment: I had a supportive boss and colleagues who were willing to help. I was free to act and asked for, and received, help whenever needed.

3. Influence Others: I learned that I could work with and influence people who didn’t work for me and who had their own needs, opinions, and objectives. By just taking the next step, and the next step, I was able to get folks aligned around a set of ideas and bring them to fruition.

4. Trust the Process: I pursued this project without expectations. Following Walt’s lead, I developed and pursued these ideas without even considering whether approval was possible or what success might mean for my career. I simply worked them and stayed out of my own way.

5. Find a New Job: Success like this was not likely again. I learned it was time to take my learnings and move on to another job. This experience did set my career expectations very high, and it’s been necessary to take the not-so-good with the great while staying humble in the process. Those are stories for another day!

If you find this story interesting, let me know what questions you have and especially what you’d like to know more about. And if you’re trying to achieve unachievable things inside your organization, please share your experiences.

Thanks for reading!

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I used to imagine myself sitting on my deck and taking in an amazing view of the “Rocky F$@%ing Mountains.”

It was just a joke. I had no intention of making it happen. Looking back, I did go to Denver for a job interview in my early days (“salad days???”), but that played no role in my imagination.

Fast forward many years, and we’ve moved to Tacoma, WA, for my new job with Tacoma Power. We’re house-hunting again. We made a last-minute offer for a house we liked but lost out to higher bidders. So now we had to get serious about this house-hunting thing.

We finally identified a house that worked for us (not too big, nice neighborhood, good value, etc., etc., etc., yadda yadda yadda, blah blah blah). Before making an offer, I suggested we look at the other homes on our list, just in case.

I’m in the office when my iPhone buzzes. “Can you come right now to see this house?” “I’m working right now. Can I come later today or tomorrow?” There was a sense of urgency in her voice, so I said, “I’m on my way.”

GPS is fantastic, by the way, and I made it to the correct address. I drove up the driveway and parked. I went up the front stairs (which are actually in the back?), and my wife started showing me around. She took me out on the deck, and there it was. Mount Rainier was out, in all her splendor. We could see some other mountains in the Cascade range, but “The Mountain” was, well, splendiferous!

We weren’t looking for a “view home,” but the house was perfect for us in so many ways. We put in an offer, closed in a few weeks, and moved in after some renovations. It’s been a great place to live for the last 9+ years.

Fast forward to yesterday. We drove to The Mountain for the first time. Great seeing it up close and personal, not just through zooming in with my camera.

There it is. Not the “Rocky _F$@%ing Mountains,” but superb in other respects. My wife has always loved living near the water, at least within driving distance of an ocean. The Rockies wouldn’t have been suitable for us, but we have a view of Commencement Bay and can drive to the Pacific Ocean whenever we want. Maybe that’ll be our next day trip?

Takeaways

1. Sometimes what we imagine comes true in another form. It’s all good!

2. The Mountain is hiding behind the haze today, presenting perhaps the #1 lesson of living in the Great PNW: Take advantage of the excellent weather now because you never know when it’ll be good again!

3. The same idea applies in other realms. For example, go to that jam session because you never know when the next opportunity to play music with others will come around again. #lessonlearned and #workingonit!!!

I was honored to be selected as a speaker for our class, and after running out of time on my 7-minute talk at the beginning of our ALF journey, I decided to write this one out and make sure it fit within the timeframe. Here’s the speech.

Good Morning!

It’s so great to see everyone, to be in your presence again. I’ve missed us!

I want to thank those of you who voted for me to give this speech. Another seven minutes? What will I do with it? Maybe pick up where I left off last time, around 1972?

Random Memories

I’ve been so grateful for the opportunity to be part of ALF! Some random memories came to me as I prepared for this talk:

• The first circle at the Marriott when Beth had us close our eyes and breathe

• Being shocked that there were other people in the room when I finally opened my eyes

• I was – and am – so impressed with everyone

• I remembered he circle we sat in after our solos, the things we told each other, the tears

• All the hands in the air to support classmates who were walking on the cable at Mountain Springs

• Being caught by those hands when I fell off that cable

• I remember excelling at Uno

• The fun we had playing two truths and a lie

• I loved hearing trash-talk while Genie, Scott, and others were playing spades

• Hugs from Beth

• I appreciated Cliff telling me, “don’t work yourself to death. I’ve seen too many black men do that.”

• My walks with Katie trying to answer difficult questions

• Conversations with Steph

• The fearlessness of Senator Nobles

• The genius of Rosie

• Playing table tennis at Mountain Springs. Well, Tong was playing table tennis. I was evidently playing ping pong.

• Profound conversations with Chris

Lessons

I don’t know how it is for you, but I’ve traveled through life blissfully unaware. I do things. Have ideas. Interact. Live. Work. Love.

I imagine I’m a boat traveling through water. As I move about, I’m leaving a wake behind me. It gets longer and longer, stretching out wider and wider until it disappears. And I’m now miles ahead on my journey.

I leave a wake, and it touches those in its path. Sometimes positively, sometimes not.

But I’m miles ahead and have no idea. I don’t see the impact the wake is having, the impact I’m causing.

ALF has been a profound experience for me. You spend time with people. Get to know each other. You like them. You love them. You want to help them, to see them flourish. And build community.

New Best Friends! That’s what I was told would happen, and happened it has.

But there’s something else. We start to see ourselves differently. We begin to see possibilities we didn’t or couldn’t see before.

We start to see ourselves through each others’ eyes. The story we tell ourselves, it changes. At least it did for me.

The thing is, I don’t see myself the way you see me. When I learn how you see me and understand the impact I’m having, that’s pure gold. Learning the impact I’m having gives me a chance to adjust, and maybe to walk and talk, with a little more confidence and purpose.

Courage

When we arrived at Mountain Springs, we were asked to identify three objectives for our Leadership Action Plan. #1 for me was ** courage:**

“I act to create change by speaking my truth, even when doing so may cause discomfort or conflict.”

Looking through my notes and remembering conversations with my buddy Lee and others, courage was a recurring theme, repeated throughout the week. How can I speak my truth? Hell, what is the truth I wish to speak? Why have I been avoiding speaking my truth?

Then on our last morning, we were exchanging gifts. I selected this orange heart. Maybe it reached out to me? I picked it up, held it in my hand. As Cliff started to explain why he shared that gift, I turned the stone over and saw the word “Courage.” Okay, that was deep! Then Cliff told me, “Bill you have courage. This heart isn’t courage. This is just a reminder that you already have courage!”

I needed that reminder. Grappling with courage, but also hearing what Cliff said. Sometimes we need a mirror when a mirror just won’t do. We need help from someone, so we can see ourselves with new eyes.

Closing the loop, this last week I found myself unmuting myself on Zoom and speaking the truth as I saw it in front of 80 people, “politely (but unequivocally) disagreeing” with my boss. I did so without thinking about courage, without even thinking about myself. What happened next was kind of magical. The conversation changed. Other people start to speak up. They felt freer to speak their truths.

People need to hear our truths, but our example can help them have the courage to express themselves. Maybe that’s some progress?

More Osmosis

The pandemic, George Floyd, and the election have impacted our lives and our ALF year. This difficult time has also given us an opportunity to put into practice many of the tools and lessons we have learned.

As a result of the pandemic, I’ve had the opportunity to reconnect with folks from college all those years ago. We’ve shared our experiences and, as a result, I learned things I didn’t know before. While I completed all my coursework, much of my learning came via osmosis. We black students were scattered across the college, but we created a community for each other that helped us survive that experience and become doctors, lawyers, leaders, poets. I didn’t even realize we were helping each other, not like I realize it now. I didn’t know the positive impact I had on others way back then.

My ALF experience has been more osmosis, and this has been the first time since college that I’ve been a part of this kind of community, where we get to know each other so well, so deeply. I’m so grateful!

We Leave a Wake

Classmates, we all leave a wake. The cool thing, though, is we help each other see ourselves. We’re reflected in each others’ eyes. We learn the impact we have had. We learn the impact we can have. And we prove that we can join together to have even greater impact.

I love our class! I love all y’all. Thanks for letting me be part of your journey. Thanks to our families for giving us the support we need (and for listening to all our ALF stories)! Finally, thanks to those who organized and guided us through the process, including Beth, Steph, Jahmad, Moe, Bill, Cliff, Brian, Jeanese, and others I might have missed!

And, oh yeah, Trust the Process!

Thanks, everybody!

This post was originally published on postbop.com.

This year, members of Tacoma Power’s Senior Leadership Team (SLT) were asked to contribute blog posts with the theme, “My Behavior Style and how it benefits me as a leader,” and “My Behavior Style and areas I am growing into.”

The core Outward Mindset idea is Mindset —> Behavior —> Results.

The blogging assignment got me to reflect on where – and how – the behavior styles we learned about in leadership training fit into that equation?

Here’s my story.

MYERS BRIGGS TYPE INDICATOR

Once upon a time, many years ago, I completed my first Myers Briggs Type Indicator(MBTI) assessment. I was thrilled when I learned I was an ENFP, and loved the descriptions I read, including:

ENFP – Impassioned Catalyst

Outgoing, friendly, and accepting. Exuberant lovers of life, people, and material comforts. Enjoy working with others to make things happen. Bring common sense and a realist approach to their work, and make work fun. Flexible and spontaneous, adapt readily to new people and environments. Learn best by trying a new skill with other people.

And this:

Where ENFPs do not shine is in systems of strict regimentation and hierarchy, such as military service. ENFPs thrive on the ability to question the status quo and explore the alternatives, and if this is a quality that is not just unappreciated but actually frowned upon, this will not only make them unhappy, but it may even threaten their emotional stability.

All of that resonated with me. I’ve now completed the MBTI ten or fifteen times over the years, always with the same results. I love being an ENFP (even if my penchant for new ideas drives my colleagues crazy) and would freak out if an assessment showed something different. Yes, I’m an ENFP for life!

BIRKMAN ASSESSMENTS

When I joined our organization in 2012, one of my first tasks was to meet our team-building coach and take the Birkman Assessment. I found it a kind of MBTI-on-steroids. Much more detailed and hard to interpret without professional assistance. It was an accurate reflection of my behavioral style and came with some things to think about and improve.

We continued to use Birkman on the Senior Leadership Team for a while, and I used it with the team I lead. In 2017, we used Birkman for an upcoming team retreat, and I decided to retake the test. Here’s a comparison of my 2012 and 2017 Birkman’s:

Do you notice anything different? The diamond (⬦) symbols indicate my usual behavior shifted to be much more people-oriented and towards a more indirect communication style. There are other changes as well. Maybe it’s just how I answered the questions differently five-years apart?

LEAD/DISC BEHAVIOR STYLES

In our leadership training, we learned all about behavioral styles, our own and others. We learned how to lean into our styles and work with people different than ourselves. These behavioral styles are based on DiSC Styles, another self-assessment I’ve experienced over the years. Again, my results have been similar to my MBTI as described above and were consistent over time. I took the DiSC assessment in 2018 and 2019 and summarized the results in the image below.

This time a surprising change occurred. The black dot summarizing my behavioral style shifted from the Dominance quadrant (and close to influence) squarely in the Support or Steadiness quadrant. I was surprised by the magnitude of the change and the fact it occurred in such a short time.

SOME TAKEAWAYS

• We Can Change Our Style: When describing my ENFP MBTI type, I mentioned that I’d freak out if it changed. These behavioral styles all represent who I am, and I like being me. However, the Birkman and DiSC results demonstrate that behavioral style isn’t immutable.

• Our behavioral styles can change. The “E” in ENFP says I’m extraverted, but I’ve become more introverted over time. And my colleague Julie has shown me that I do some things in an extraverted way (think out loud, for example), and others in a much more introverted way (like test ideas against my philosophy or principles).

• What explains how my Birkman and DiSC styles changed? In Arbinger’s Developing and Implementing an Outward Mindset (DIOM) workshop, we learn that our behaviors, collective and individual, produce our business and personal results. We also understand that Mindset drives behavior and that organizations that focus on changing mindset first are much more likely to achieve improved organizational results than those focusing only on behavior.

  I think the change in these results (especially DiSC) may mean my work on Outward Mindset (through facilitating workshops for my team and others and trying to implement the tools we learn in DIOM) has helped me shift my mindset and my behaviors. While I’m frequently in the box, I’ve learned to apply tools and ideas that help me be more self-aware and get out of the box I’m in.

• Behavior Styles as Justification. In DIOM, we learn that when we betray our sense to help someone, we instantly develop a list of excuses that justify our not doing what we know is right. The justifications may be reasons why the other person doesn’t deserve our help or ways they’ve mistreated us in the past. And the justifications frequently elevate our sense of ourselves, as in we’re too busy, etc.

  I can use my behavior styles as justification. I can use my status as an ENFP to focus on me, on making my ideas happen, in a way that runs roughshod over others. And my behavior styles can hamper my self-awareness that anything like this is even happening.

IT’S COMPLICATED

Behavioral styles represent the unique characteristics we bring along in our roles as a leader, manager, supervisor, and individual contributor. We can be more successful in all of those roles if we can shift our mindsets to be more outward and change our behaviors to be more helpful.

RESOURCES

1. Books. Two Arbinger books, Leadership and Self-Deception and The Anatomy of Peace explain what mindset is, why it’s so important, and how mindset can hurt – or help – our efforts at work and at home. They’re both written as fables, one in a business setting, the other more personal. And if made-up stories are not your thing, read The Outward Mindset, also by Arbinger. I can’t recommend them highly enough.

2. Workshops. The City of Tacoma continues to offer Developing and Implementing an Outward Mindset and Outward Leadership workshops to City employees. A virtual DIOM workshop (four half-day sessions) kicks off this week and will happen monthly. A virtual Outward Leadership workshop (two half-day sessions about a month apart) open to DIOM graduates begins on March 1. With supervisor approval, you can sign up through your training representative.

3. Outward Mindset Sustainment Check-ins. We held two eight-week rounds of video sustainment last year. In each 45 minute session, where we checked in with each other, processed an Outward Mindset-related video together, and helped with challenges we might be facing. Feedback was excellent and led us to convene a weekly check-in. They’ll be Mondays at 8 am beginning on February 1 and open to all across the City who’d like to participate. We hope these will help all of us #TurnTacomaMoreOutward.

4. Practice. Practice. Practice. For those of you who haven’t seen it, here’s a video about a guy who learned a demanding new skill by practicing in small bites until it kicked in. The mindset and leadership behaviors take a while to learn, and we sometimes give up trying before we see the benefit. This video is an example of what can happen if we keep going and give ourselves time to learn and grow.

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

This post originally appeared in someofthebestideas.com.

A few years ago, I was having lunch with a colleague. She was talking about trying to find her calling. At one point, I asked her what she thought my calling was. “I don’t know” came first, followed by, “Help people. I think your calling is to help people.”

I hadn’t thought about that kind of question in quite a while, but her answer seemed right. I’ve learned sometimes we need help figuring things out, including what we think about things.

During a different lunch conversation (I really miss having lunch with people!!), my companion asked a powerful question I hadn’t contemplated before: “How did you get to be you?” Okay, that’s both powerful and deep! Powerful because I couldn’t possibly have had an answer ready, and because it showed so much curiosity on her part.

It was profound because it required me to go there, to go beyond surface-level “blah blah blah.” I love going deep and having meaningful, even challenging conversations.

“How did you get to be you?” I fumbled around for a way to even begin to answer, and eventually, some coherent thoughts appeared. I mostly talked about events in my life and the fact that, had they not occurred, I wouldn’t be here. I’m sure I’d be somewhere, just not here.

FOR EXAMPLE…

When I was a junior in high school, Mr. Pollack, the math department chair, walked up to me, draped his arm across my shoulders, and asked, “Bill, what math class are you taking next year?” Since I was finishing four years of math in three years, I told him I was done. “No, you’re not done,” he said and put me in AP Math. It was there I started learning calculus and began my love affair with computers and programming. Who knows where I’d be without his friendly intervention?

I’ve had so many moments that, had they not occurred or if I hadn’t been open to suggestion, I’d be doing something totally different. Maybe even a totally different person.

CONNECT THE DOTS

I recently came across a quote from Steve Jobs that explains a lot:

You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future.

You have to trust in something—your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.

The inflection points in my life are the dots Steve Jobs described. I can now see exactly how I got here. I certainly couldn’t see it then. Many of those dots were like Mr. Pollack, someone who noticed something about me that I couldn’t see, and gave me advice, a nudge, or quietly took action on my behalf.

A few years after college, I worked on the Assembly Speaker’s staff in Albany, NY, and looking for my next job. I had promised my boss I would either leave before the legislative session started or stay through the end in July or August. I was interviewing out-of-state, and the timing wasn’t looking great.

In early December, I got a call from Walt Kicinski asking me if I’d be interested in working in the Governor’s office. He described the job, and I told him I was definitely interested. I also told him about my timing situation. I interviewed and was hired. I started the new role three weeks later on the first business day in January.

I hadn’t known Walt, so how did he reach out to me? I had taken an econometrics class at Albany State’s Graduate School of Public Affairs. Eric Markell had previously worked for Walt and got to know me through the course. He told Walt about me, becoming Inflection Point #27 (who keeps count of these things, anyway?). A dot. The econometrics class helped prepare me for my current role. A fantastic job in the Governor’s Office wouldn’t have happened without being noticed by Eric, who talked to Walt, etc.

LESSON: BE A DOT

So what’s the lesson here? I wouldn’t be here without many dots, and I don’t know how many dots are in my future. I have an opportunity to be like Mr. Pollack, Eric Markell, Walt Kicinski, and all the dots that helped me make this journey. I can be a dot, a person who helps others along their journey. I think that’s what my colleague meant when she said my calling is to help people.

What’s your calling? Let me know if I can help!

This post was originally published at someofthebestideas.com.

In October 2016, I spent four days in San Francisco going to every SFJAZZ Collective performance featuring the music of Miles Davis. The song I most wanted them to play was "Joshua," and they didn't disappoint. The intro threw me off, but somehow the changes let me know what was coming.

I love this song and have played it a zillion times. I remember first trying to learn it by just listening to the original recording and counting along in my Real Book as the measures sped by. The changes in time signature between 4/4 and 3/4 make it both challenging and exhilarating.

Anyway, as I listen I'm feeling emotional right now, and not sure why, exactly. Maybe because of so much loss in the world right now.

I'm reminded of a question I used to ask, "How does music make you feel?" Not how do you feel listening to this music, but exactly HOW does it do that? How does it make us feel the way we do when we hear it?

I now know that's a trick question. The music doesn't make us feel … anything. It's our brain's interpretation of what we're hearing, our brain connecting what we hear to our history, our emotions, our past, our culture. That's how music makes us feel.

So those emotions I was just feeling, that was my brain working. Maybe along with my heart. Head and heart. And perhaps that's why I can feel some kinda way when hearing the same song, the same part of a song, over and over again.

I love the feeling of connection with people, with the past, with what's coming.

Anyway, that's Joshua y'all. Deep. Changes and changing. Uptempo. Energizing!

Later!

This post was originally published on SomeoftheBestIdeas.com.

Once upon a time, I was fixing to get ready to walk into a leadership team-building workshop. While improving the team had sorta been my idea, past retreats hadn’t gone too well. They all seemed to focus on why I wasn’t like everybody else, and I decided I wasn’t doing that again.

Before leaving home that morning, I wrote in my journal. The basic idea is to clear my head, empty my thoughts onto paper, and contemplate what I want to do that day. I always start with the date, followed by the name of a song that’s reverberating in my head. This day I chose an Eddie Harris song called “Listen Here!”

In keeping with the theme, I wrote myself the following instructions:

Listen
Ask questions
Be curious
Ask humble questions
Listen
Summarize
Synthesize
Pass
Say “I don’t know.”
“Let me think about that.”
Speak the kind truth? Nah!!
Observe
Shut up!
Listen!

How’d That Work?

I thought the day was going well until my boss approached me during our lunch break.

“Bill, are you okay?”
“Sure. Why do you ask?
“Well, you haven’t said anything all morning, and that’s not like you!”
“Oh, I’m fine. I’ve just been listening. Taking it all in.”

You see, I’d forgotten to actually participate in the conversation. While I didn’t want to provide my colleagues ammunition they could use to attack me, I also didn’t want that to be noticeable. So I chimed in more the rest of the day.

Message From Above?

During the afternoon session, a buzz from my watch notified me that a new Harvard Business Review “Ideacast” had been downloaded to my iPhone. The title? “Become a Better Listener!” Surely this was a message from on high that, despite my faux pas, I was on the right track.

Over the next day or two, I listened to the podcast. It featured an interview with Mark Goulston about his book, Just Listen: Discover the Secret to Getting Through to Absolutely Anyone. I read the book.

The American Management Association published Goulston’s book, and they offered a class based on Just Listen. I took the class.

The podcast, book, and training were all excellent. Goulston's work featured a deep dive into brain science to help explain how and why we respond to stimuli the way we do. The book and class also provided practical tips for handling different situations we face and improving our ability to listen.

A Journey Begins

I ended up taking four AMA seminars over the next year:

• Just Listen!

• The Voice of Leadership: How Leaders Inspire, Influence, and Achieve Results

• Leading with Emotional Intelligence

• Transformational Leadership: How to Inspire Extraordinary Performance

I learned a lot in each class. I was clearly searching for something, and I'm pretty sure I found it!

More on that in a future episode…

Lessons Learned?

What questions do you have?

This post was originally published on someofthebestideas.com.

Jim Jefferson would always ask me the same question whenever we'd cross paths in San Francisco: "When are you going to fix this?" By "this," he was referring to everything in a pretty dysfunctional organization, so I always laughed. I thought of it as just a joke. A rhetorical question shared between two people who knew how hard fixing all this would be. Hard as in, "impossible!"

While Jim is no longer with us, his question now haunts me. Suppose he wasn't being rhetorical? Suppose Jim saw me as someone who really could fix it? At least put a big dent in it? Could that be true? Have I been underperforming all these years? Not trying enough (or hard enough)? Biting off less than I can chew? And, if so, why exactly?

In a conversation a few weeks ago, a new colleague put a very different question to me: "What's holding you back?" she asked. "What's stopping you?"

Damn! That's a great question! A little more approachable than Jim's, perhaps. Not rhetorical. And without a hint of blame, just pure curiosity.

After our conversation, as I tried to come up with an answer, I thought of these words from the late Gil Scott-Heron's Don't Give Up:

I was obviously too blind and probably too weak
To see who was responsible for my losing streak
The best way to explain it is to say simply because
I was looking around outside, and the truth is,
I was the one.

It's clear now. I've been holding me back. I've been the one keeping me from doing what I know I should do! How? By focusing on me, worrying about what people will think. By not doing what I can do (and making up plenty of excuses along the way).

So, that's my story. Welcome to my world! Now the serious work begins. I've got to work on fixing this!

What's stopping you? What's holding you back?

Whatever you do, don't give up!

There's A Lesson There…

Do you see how a well-placed question can get us thinking more deeply about things we've been ignoring? Don't try to answer too quickly if you are ever asked such a question. Let it marinate. Take time to think and maybe dig a little deeper. And if you're the one asking the question, don't worry about their answer. Let the other person wrestle with it in their own time.

This post was originally published on someofthebestideas.com.

I recently came across this great quote from Martha Graham:

“There is a vitality, a life force, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and there is only one of you in all time. This expression is unique, and if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium; and be lost. The world will not have it.

“It is not your business to determine how good it is, not how it compares with other expression. It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open. You have to keep open and aware directly to the urges that motivate you. Keep the channel open.

“No artist is pleased. There is no satisfaction whatever at any time. There is only a queer, divine dissatisfaction, a blessed unrest that keeps us marching and makes us more alive than the others.”

Well, that certainly got me thinking.

I am usually happy. I don’t know that I’ve always been. At the same time, I’m almost always focused on making something different happen. Something new.

I’m habitually and unconsciously dissatisfied with what is and want to make it new, different, and better.

Maybe I like jazz because it's like that too. Nothing is ever the same as it was. Every performance is unique. Searching. That’s kind of the whole point!

It’s not my business to determine whether my contribution is good or bad, ugly or beautiful. I just have to get my ideas out there.

And do that again. And again. And again…

Being unsettled is a semi-permanent condition. But not apprehensive. I’m not anxious, fearful, or dreadful. Certainly not at this moment.

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In the moment. That’s another thing about jazz. Being right … there.

I always say that playing music, playing my bass, is like a mini-vacation. When I’m playing, I’m in that moment. Because I’m not good enough to play and think about anything else.

I have to listen. Keep time. Stop rushing — always!! Listen. Contribute. Listen.

Just listen.

It’s a beautiful thing.

OTOH, I hate listening to recordings of myself playing. I only hear the wrong notes. When I listen to a presentation I’ve done, all I hear is “… um.” Still, it’s not my business to determine how good it is…

I’m creative. My canvas is ideas. Or maybe ideas are my paint, my notes? Problems? Perhaps that’s the canvas…

I don’t own the ideas. I give them away (for pay) at work. Or for free. Doesn’t matter. I’ve got more.

I’ll produce more. Upon demand. I have to do it. I’m a world-class idea improvising machine. An idea artist.

Years ago, I took the Strengthfinders test and learned “Ideation” was one of my top five. Ideation!

I finally get it! Thanks, Martha!

“And,” mutters to himself, “the ideas ramble on.”

Amen.

This post was originally published on someofthebestideas.com.

Shortly after starting my job, my new boss asked me to take on a major organizational change initiative. To get all the work done, I asked members of my staff to play critical roles. Their ideas, support, time, and effort were pivotal.

The project launched on schedule and seemed successful. I thought everything was great!

No, things weren't great!

In the process of getting the new system off the ground, I created some problems for my team. The biggest? I was totally unaware there were any problems.

Even after seeing some warning signs, I didn’t have a clue. I asked people what was wrong and didn’t understand the answers.

Finally, I asked a trusted consultant to come in and interview everyone in the group, including me. Her brief report described the main themes and kept their input confidential.

During our meeting to review the report, she helped me understand what the team was feeling. The most compelling concerns were widely shared. Some of it was hard to listen to.

I had broken my team!

At the end of our meeting, the consultant gave me some great feedback: “When you called me you said you didn’t know what was going on. Well, now you know. And now you have an opportunity to take action.”

We shared the report, including the consultant’s recommendations, at a full team meeting and the discussion confirmed her findings. With everyone on the same page, we were able to get enough buy-in to follow almost all of her recommendations. Focus, time and effort helped us turn things around.

How Can You Fix Something You Don’t Know Is Broken?

Having an expert dive into our team issues was risky because my warts would be (and were) exposed for all to see.

It was also risky for another reason. Armed with the team’s candid criticisms, I had to change. My approach and behavior needed to be visibly different. If not, things would only get worse.

Regardless of risk, receiving feedback I could understand, believe and act on was essential.

Try These Ideas for Seeking Feedback:

Ask Your Team — At least once a year, have your team answer these two questions about you:

• What are you doing that is working well?

• What could you improve?

Ask someone on the team to facilitate the group’s discussion and summarize key themes in a confidential manner. Make it safe for them by leaving the room. When you return, listen carefully and seek clarification by asking for examples.

Ask Colleagues for Advice - Before ending one-on-one meetings with members of your team, customers and stakeholders:

• Ask: “What advice do you have for me?” or

• Say: ”Give me some advice.”

If the person struggles finding an answer, that’s okay. Silence is your friend so resist the temptation to step in. Just wait. You’ll be amazed at their sage advice!

Feedback is a gift!

How you respond is critical so be sure to:

• Summarize what you’ve heard and make sure they agree you’ve got it right.

• Ask for suggested next steps.

• Thank them for the candid feedback, and especially having the courage to tell you what you might not like to hear.

• Cherish the gift you’ve just been given.

Then follow up by taking action.

Takeaway: Showing Vulnerability Helps Build Trust

Do you know what’s harder than being tough? Being vulnerable.

Asking for and receiving feedback places you in a vulnerable position because you don’t know what you’re going to hear and the feedback may be critical of you.

In The Five Dysfunctions of a Team, Patrick Lencioni explains why taking the risk is good, and even necessary:

“The most important action that a leader must take to encourage the building of trust on a team is to demonstrate vulnerability first. This requires that a leader risk losing face in front of the team, so that subordinates will take the same risk themselves. What is more, team leaders must create an environment that does not punish vulnerability. Even well-intentioned teams can subtly discourage trust by chastising one another for admissions of weakness or failure. Finally, displays of vulnerability on the part of a team leader must be genuine; they cannot be staged. One of the best ways to lose the trust of a team is to feign vulnerability in order to manipulate the emotions of others.” (emphasis added)

For more insight about vulnerability-based trust, read The Five Dysfunctions and The Advantage: Why Organizational Health Trumps Everything Else In Business, both great books by Lencioni.

How Do You Ask for Feedback? Comments Welcome!

This post was originally published on someofthebestideas.com.

I love hearing Mulgrew talk about those rare transcendent experiences as the reason for playing this music. Deep and similar to how other jazz greats have spoken about the exact same thing. #thatswhatlifeisallabout!!!

I love to apply great business ideas where I work. Change is it for me. Positive change. From great to awesome! Alas, it’s hard. Difficult. So many obstacles. I cherish the moments when there’s a connection, a spark. When something great happens.

The thing is, that’s a lot like jazz. In this interview, Mulgrew Miller says what Dizzy Gillespie and many others said. Great, great musicians reach moments of transcendence … rarely.

It happens. And that’s what they live for. But they don’t know when it’s going to happen. Can’t preded on someofthebestideas.com.blah. blah. blah.

This post was originally published on postbop.com.